LIVING OFFLINE: HOW TWO FAMILIES NAVIGATE TEEN LIFE WITHOUT SOCIAL MEDIA
- Amodu Oluwanishola
- Jul 13, 2024
- 3 min read
Meet Kate Bulkeley and Gabriela Durham, two teenagers who have chosen a different path in the digital age by steering clear of social media.
Kate Bulkeley's Journey :
Kate Bulkeley decided to ditch social media when she entered high school, and the benefits were immediate. Her grades soared, she immersed herself in books, and her family enjoyed lively dinner conversations and movie nights.
However, sophomore year brought unexpected challenges. Kate missed a student government meeting arranged on Snapchat, and her Model U.N. team's reliance on social media created scheduling headaches. Even her Bible Study club at her Connecticut high school communicated through Instagram.
Gabriela Durham's Experience:
Gabriela Durham, a high school senior in Brooklyn, credits her success to staying off social media. She's an organized, straight-A student with multiple college acceptances and recently made her Broadway debut. Though she once felt like an outsider, Gabriela now wears it as a badge of honor.
In a world where social media dominates, some parents like Gabriela’s mother, Elena Romero, enforce strict rules. They delayed giving phones until middle school and banned social media until 18. This approach has led to fewer screen-time battles at home, but the path isn't always smooth.
Challenges of Life Without Social Media:
Navigating adolescence without social media can be isolating. Gabriela often feels left out when her peers bond over TikTok trends and Instagram posts. Yet, she also finds freedom in not being tethered to these platforms. "From my perspective as an outsider, it seems like a lot of kids use social media to promote a facade," she says.
The New Reality of Social Media:
Social media isn't just a distraction anymore; it's become an integral part of teenage life, shaping identities and social interactions. According to the Pew Research Center, 95% of teenagers use social media, with over a third on it "almost constantly." This seamless blend of digital and non-digital worlds is something many adults struggle to understand.
Mental Health Concerns:
Excessive social media use has been linked to increased risks of depression and anxiety. U.S. Surgeon General Vivek Murthy has highlighted the mental health risks associated with more than three hours of daily social media use.
Parental Approaches:
Both the Bulkeleys and Romero families took proactive steps. They educated their children on the impact of social media and enforced strict rules. Elena Romero waited until her daughters reached middle school before giving them phones and banned social media until they were 18. The Bulkeleys were inspired by the "Wait Until 8th" pledge, delaying smartphones and social media until at least eighth grade.
Struggles and Adjustments:
Despite these efforts, challenges remain. Kate Bulkeley needed Instagram to fulfill her responsibilities as co-president of her Bible Study Club. Her parents reluctantly allowed it, frustrated that school activities necessitated this change.
Real-Life Stories:
After a dance class in the Bronx, Gabriela witnessed her peers' obsession with social media firsthand. Fifteen-year-old Arielle Williams confessed to staying up until 5 a.m. scrolling through TikTok. Gabriela, listening silently, later reflected on the insanity of those screen-time hours.
Back home in Brooklyn, Gabriela’s rigorous schedule leaves little room for social media. Her family, especially her mother Elena, ensures the girls stay busy with activities, minimizing idle time that could lead to excessive phone use.
Different Approaches, Same Goal:
While each family’s approach differs, both aim to protect their children from the potential harms of social media. Gabriela’s mother considers bending the rules for her younger daughter Gionna, who wants to become a book reviewer on Instagram. Similarly, the Bulkeleys allowed Kate limited Instagram access for school-related activities.
Future Challenges:
Both families continue to navigate the evolving landscape of social media and its impact on their children. Schools are experimenting with phone bans to encourage face-to-face interactions and reduce anxiety.
Ultimately, these families show that while life without social media can be challenging, it offers unique rewards and fosters a closer-knit family dynamic. As Gabriela wisely notes, social media has shifted from a tool for connection to a platform for bragging, often leaving users feeling inadequate.
Conclusion
Kate Bulkeley and Gabriela Durham’s experiences highlight the complex relationship teenagers have with social media. Their stories show that while opting out of social media can be isolating, it also provides freedom and focus. For parents and teens alike, finding the right balance remains an ongoing challenge, but these families demonstrate that it's possible to thrive offline.
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